Quite a discovery i made in that little expedition.

I found trees. That sure sounds interesting doesn´t it? especially considering that my job was finding them, cutting them and bringing them back. Well, how about walking, talking, five-eyed trees. Is that exciting enough for you? Well not only i saw them, i talked to them. And even though the first normal reaction to seeing such visions would be to run for your life, i felt so calm near them, even more evidence of my new found madness.

Now here is the golden part; they call themselves The Unfallen. Funny, now that i think about it, after all my woodcutter profesion demanded i made them the opposite. It gets better; they are not from this planet and apparently i was to stay with them until they said otherwise.

Naturally, i agreed.

From me they learned the basic traits of my species, a damn poor choice i agree, but it must have been enough for a couple of days later they decided to visit the many nations of my land. Have you ever tried explaining new concepts and ideas to old people? If yes i´m sure you know how difficult it must be. How do you think it went with millenia old tree-folk.

Surprisingly to no one, i failed. Surprisingly to me. they didn´t get turned into firewood while making contact with even the most xenophobic of governments. And surprisingly to all, the ones who turned them into firewood were themselves. A supposed gesture of goodwill as their smoke will apparently cleanse our polluted air. Nothing like a bit of self-immolation to get a good relation started.

Immediately afterwards began the blunders; trying to convince a mechanical saw of the importance of nature, preaching non violence to the ravenous man-eater plants of the jungles in the south, the baffling comments to politicians of the usefulness of sporelings and seeds in mind manipulation, and how to forget when a dust intoxicated sapling personally met and humiliated the very best minds before disappearing on an unidentified ship. Its last statement: "Beating these eggheads in their own game is the most fun i´ve ever had, i´ll do the same for every other civilization".

It was clear that this was their first time meeting other species, and their objective of subjugating us through diplomatic means failed spectacularly. It was easy to see why, pacifism by nature and near immortality may sound nice to hippies, (they specially loved the fact they were trees) but it leads to a mind boggling narrow mindedness and incapacity to adapt to other cultures.

Still, they are no pushovers and should they do away with their natural sluggishness and rigidness, there would be no one who could deny anything to them.

Why am i using this horribly primitive (500 maximum words, are you insane?) medium of communication to say this?

And why am i saying this to you?

I was never told to go home. And we are coming for you.

In theory it would be the sapling that ran away in the unidentified spaceship. The introduction  is a little bit cheap but i think it could have an interesting story with other scientist heroes or with the sophons. 500 words is very rough.